My name is Ike. I am a writer. I drink way too much herbal tea and believe in the power of kindness, love and a good book.

I blog about Relationships, God and Style!

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Letters to my greatgrand-daughter

My dear Greatgrand-daughter,

I hope you have developed a taste for do’s and don’ts. I advise you develop it fast as I have a lot of letters coming your way. I can imagine you want to “live your life” as some say. I couldn't agree more, my love. Live it wisely though. Your Greatgrand-father and I are about to start having children. We have both prayed not to have a girl. To raise a girl, you have to teach her to be wise and cunning, which is so much trouble. However, I know we will.

First, I hope you are a reader and not merely a watcher of entertainment. Turn off the TV shows for a bit and buy a book, read and imagine. Try writing as well, create. I also hope they aren’t remaking new marvel action movies for the umpteenth time. I also hope James Bond is at least 6 feet tall again.

Please remember, you cannot get good results by making poor decisions. Learn to make good decisions. It’s very simple too. Any action which answers “Yes” to the question “Will it hurt in the morning?” or “Will it hurt someone else?” is probably a bad decision. For example, “Should I do these shots?”

Drink but don’t get drunk. It clouds your judgment and it's overrated.

Many people get drunk to “wind down”, “be more fun”, “relax”, “to justify their cursing”, “to be better company”, “to forget the pain”.  If you want to curse, do it sober. If you want to relax, do it sober. If you want to wind down, have a glass of red.If you get drunk to erase the pain, it will be waiting beside your bed (or the road side, just in case you didn't make it to bed). Trust me, I tried.

Please do not always feel the need to be in the company of others. Love yourself and your own company. But also do not be a loner. Learn to be good company. To be better company you have to read, read far and wide, about things you love, things you hate and things you are indifferent about. Read about planes, automobiles, fashion, politics, the NEWS, history, the solar system, food, travel, culture, craft, animals, sports, trade, know the map. Do not underestimate the power of a good conversation. That’s how to be good company. If you are the life of the party who screams 'Let’s get wasted',all the time, you will be great company too, but only on the weekends.

Respectfully shut up anyone who refers to you as “not fun”. You are fun. If someone thinks you aren't, then please understand that the person has not developed that side of himself/herself that appreciates your preferences. Do not apologize for your preferences and please do not try adopt theirs either. This doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy what they do but do not do it because they belittled your interests and dismissed them as “boring”.

If you need to justify your cursing then obviously you have no air of audacity. Develop that, but make sure you aren't arrogant. Everyone hates an arrogant person. Cursing. You must become a woman who doesn't need to curse to emphasize her emotions or curse to be taken seriously. Make sure when you speak you are listened to and make sure you don’t speak too often. It’s more rewarding to listen and think. People do not think anymore, Charly (I hope this is your name). People would rather stare at their phones these days and ignore other people physically in their presence. I hope you appreciate your relationships, both family and friends. Love those you see every day, look for lost contacts and build bridges, your greatgrand-pa taught me that (he is so sexy, by the way).

Make sure you think and reason. Do not follow the crowd. Think about politics, about institutions, about children, about death, about God, about life, about your immediate environment and how you can add to these. Be proactive in your mind and in your dealings. Don’t be mindless and allow the world to throw stuff at you. Throw stuff at the world, make it play catch. You are the boss, my dear. Don’t be unprepared for life’s curve balls, some of them do curve wrong. Be strong, cry if you must but move on and devise.

Most importantly, Charly, people look very silly drunk. So make sure you laugh at them.

X Great gran.

The Post-nuptial let-go