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My name is Ike. I am a writer. I drink way too much herbal tea and believe in the power of kindness, love and a good book.

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Mum, on the matter of Eloping with Dimeji

Mum, on the matter of Eloping with Dimeji

When I was in primary 2, I was going to elope with Dimeji, my crush. We had it all figured out too, after school that day, we would meet at the Mobil petrol station closest to my house at 4pm, with all our things, including our toys and disappear forever!

We were two 4 year-olds.

When I got home, I was stoked. I started packing! I couldn't tell the time yet, so I'd ask anyone around what the time was and smile knowingly to myself, counting down the hours.

At some point that evening, mum and I had a little disagreement, so I blurted out that Dimeji and I were running away this evening anyway, and pouted.
She must have laughed for a full 10 minutes. Then she said, "He's probably eating beans at home and taking a nap. When you are ready, I will take you to Mobil."
I didn't believe her though. How could Dimeji be eating beans?! He was probably packing his clothes and stuff into his Warner bros. backpack.

I asked my siblings to take me to Mobil. I had to meet Dimeji! He would be waiting! Why didn't they understand? What was so funny? No one took me, I was so sad. I kept imagining him standing at Mobil being bullied by bus drivers and taxi drivers, waiting for me with our survival gear; toys, clothes and maybe a packet of biscuits. I packed my flute too, you know, for entertainment and all.

In school, the following day, after assembly, I walked up to Dimeji to apologize for not showing up, it was my family, they just wouldn't cooperate! Would he like to try again?

Dimeji couldn't even remember that we planned to elope!

Was he kidding?! Mum was right, he probably was eating beans and chilling when he got home, while I spent all evening packing and trying to get to my rendezvous!

That was my last memory of liking Dimeji. I immediately moved on. How could he not even remember plans we made just 4 hours before? He was severely crushed but i wasn’t very forgiving. Plus this was before science validated males as the more forgetful gender!

So to Dimeji's wife or significant other, and to all the women out there really, don’t be mad at him if he forgot your anniversary and the song at your first dance. Science has proven that men are more biologically forgetful than women. Dimeji, that was no reason to ruin my only chance of eloping though!

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By the way, just because science validates the fact doesn't mean forgetting her birthday and elopement schedule is acceptable! Any Dimeji experiences or justification of this habit? Please comment below! Plus is your mum eerily right almost always?

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